Therapy Sessions
by I'll Cover Angel and Collins
Summary: When the contestants complain to their parents about the events that are going on at the playa, Chris is forced to provide therapy for them. Chris decides that instead of hiring people he'll do it and make Chef help him! Turns out they're only making it worse...
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Nada.**

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Chris was hanging out in his room, enjoying his hot tub and beer. It was one of the few things that he got to do at the playa when everyone else was sleeping or hanging out. Once 8:00pm hit he was a free man and was allowed to do what he pleased. It was part of the perks of being the host, He could host challenges whenever he wanted and he tried to do most of them during the day so he could enjoy "Chris Time."

While Chris was relaxing in his hot tub he heard his cell phone ring and he dreaded answering it. He didn't have many friends who called him so it was either the producers or his mother and he was willing to bet it would be the producers. Chris groaned and got out of his hot tub with water dripping all over the floor and walked over to his nightstand and answered it.

"Chris?" The producer asked when he answered "It's me Claudio."

"Oh, hey." Chris asked. "How are you?"

Yep, Claudio was Chris's boss and the producer who told Chris what to do and yes, Chris hated him.

"I'm doing great." Chris told him. "What amazing thing have I done this time to get this call?"

"The parents are complaining." Claudio told him. "They claim the kids are traumatized and they need therapy! At least 9 parents are requesting that you hire a therapist."

"You mean pay for those kids to discuss their personal issues?" Chris laughed. "I'd rather just let them scream at each other. At least that won't cost me a damn thing."

"Chris, you'll need to hire a therapist." Claudio informed him. "I promised the parents that I would."

"Alright, fine." Chris sighed. "I'll find someone."

Chris hung up the phone and groaned. Claudio told him that he needed to find a therapist. He never said that they had to be a legal therapist! Chris was going to do it free of charge!

* * *

Everyone gathered around in the recreational room wondering why Chris and Chef would call them for a meeting at 10:00pm everyone was tired, confused and annoyed. Finally Chris stood in front of the group.

"Chris, why did you call us here?" Gwen yawned. "I have to get up early tomorrow."

"Yeah, I usually hit the gym at 5:00am!" Eva yelled "So, what do you want?"

"I heard that some of you complained to your parents about how I do things around here." Chris glared at them all. "So, your parents want you guys in therapy! So, Chef and I will be seeing you and will be your therapists and you're all going! No choices! Chef and I will divide you all into groups and you will be talking to one of us!"

"That's illegal." Courtney tried to protest

"I don't believe in Therapy." Scott added in.

"Too bad!" Chef yelled. "We're starting tomorrow at 9:00am! sharp!"

"I'm starting with Cameron." Chris sighed. "Chef?"

"Gwen!" Chef pointed at her. "You, Me, 9:00am!"

"Why do I have to go first?" Cameron asked.

"Terrific." Gwen sighed. "I always wanted to express my feelings to Chef..."

Chris and Chef dismissed the contestants and everyone was dreading doing this.

* * *

**So, each chapter Chris and Chef will each be taking one contestant and talking with them about their feelings and crap. I think it'll be fun. I'm excited for this. **


	2. Gwen and Cameron

**Disclaimer: Nada.**

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9:00am came sooner then anyone would have wanted. Cameron was watching Trent and Lightning have a karaoke contest and Gwen was fighting with Courtney about taking the last bagel at breakfast when Chef and Chris walked into the recreational room that they were in.

"Gwen!" Chef yelled "Let's go! 9:00am means 9:00am!"

"Do I really have to do this?" Gwen sighed. "I didn't complain about anyone."

"Let's go!" Chef yelled and grabbed her by her hair which made Courtney laugh. Cameron sighed and walked over to Chris who started talking to him about how hot Lindsay was and Cameron just followed him, knowing he had no choice.

* * *

Chef decided that he was going to have his session in the kitchen at the playa and pulled out two metal folding chairs for Gwen and himself. Gwen looked around and watched as a roach went by. Chef stepped on it and sat down and Gwen made a disgusted look at Chef as she sat down.

"So, let's talk." Chef told her. "What's on your mind?"

"This isn't facebook." Gwen smirked. "However, I would like to know if you passed this year's heath inspection..."

"We aren't here to talk about me." Chef glared at her. "We're here to talk about you."

"Okay fine." Gwen sighed. "I don't understand why Courtney hates me. I mean it was Duncan's choice..."

"That's where you want to start?!" Chef yelled "I don't blame her for hating you! If you stole my boyfriend I'd light your hair on fire! You were a bad friend and now you need to apologize."

"I thought counselors didn't judge people." Gwen asked him. "You're judging me."

"You should take her out to dinner!" Chef yelled. "Set the mood and buy her some flowers! You owe her that much! What kind of friend does that?"

"Are you suggesting that I ask Courtney out on a date?" Gwen asked confused. "Can we talk about something else?"

* * *

Cameron was really creeped out by Chris. They were having a therapy session in Chris's hot tub and Cameron felt extremely awkward by all of this. Chris didn't seem too phased by the condition of his room, he had a can of beer already opened and placed on his night stand and he had unused condoms all over the floor.

"Chris, why do you have condoms all over the floor?" Cameron asked him.

"It's a personal choice." Chris told him. "Just like you decided to get into my hot tub with your shirt and pants still on and I did not."

"Chris, maybe you aren't someone I should be talking to about any kind of problems." Cameron told him.

"No!" Chris yelled. "You and I are having a conversation! So, start talking."

"Okay! Fine." Cameron complained. "I guess I wish that maybe the pool was cleaner and that I didn't have a room next to Leshawna and maybe you could paint the walls red?"

"Does this look like a hotel?" Chris glared at him. "I'm not here to accommodate you!"

"Can you make Lindsay wear pants?" Cameron asked blushing. "I mean when she roams the hallway at night it's really awkward for me."

"That's your problem?!" Chris yelled. "I would love to see really hot girls naked in the hallway!"

"Please don't yell at me..." Cameron submerged his head underwear in shame.

* * *

In the kitchen with Gwen, Chef was having slightly better luck than Chris. Gwen started to open up to Chef slightly. Gwen already admitted to Chef that she only dies her hair the way she does because of her parents divorcing. She admitted to Chef that she was the one who was smoking in the elevator and that she started when she was 13 and now she can't stop and now she was going into how it tied into Duncan.

"That's why he thought of me when he came back into the game." Gwen sighed. "I'm the one who always gave him cigarettes. Courtney wanted him to quit but I'm the one who got him smoking back in season one and he kissed me because I had menthol on my breath."

"That's a terrible reason to date someone." Chef shook his head. "You should be ashamed of yourself, Gwen! You're a really shitty person!"

"What?!" Gwen stood up. "I just told you why I'm dating Duncan!"

"Yeah, I know!" Chef yelled at her. "That's what makes you a bad person! Do you know how much money that's gonna cost that boy?! You gave him a lifelong addiction! It costs money to quit too! Do you know how long it took me to quit?! 28 years! I had to replace my habit too by chewing on wood and drinking!"

"You're judging me again, Chef." Gwen sighed. "I still love him! I mean I always wanted to date him anyway so it worked out, right?"

"Yeah, Duncan and you and bad smoking habits!" Chef scribbled something down on paper and threw it at Gwen. "This is a fine for $300 that I expect you to pay! You playa vandalizer! No smoking in the playa!"

"Seriously?" Gwen looked at the fine.

"Yes!" Chef yelled at her. "Now, I expect you to go and apologize to that Courtney girl so she'll shut up already! Take her to dinner and get over it!"

Chef pushed Gwen out of the kitchen and left her standing in the hallway with her fine.

* * *

Cameron admitted to Chris that he had never kiss a girl in his life and that he was afraid of chicken noodle soup ever since Heather dumped some on him in the shower on his first day at the playa.

"So, that's why I'm even afraid to get into this hot tub!" Cameron admitted. "That Heather is just so mean! When I was in the bubble, I never had these issues."

"You can't bring a plastic bubble in here." Chris informed him. "If I have to smell Owen's farts then you have to do it too. Plus I don't want a lawsuit if you die in that bubble, it gets all hot and nasty in here at night."

"Can I go now?" Cameron asked him. "It's getting really hot in here."

"That's why I get in here naked." Chris smirked. "You should try it."

"I'm leaving." Cameron informed him as he got out of the hot tub

"Can you hand me a beer on the way out?" Chris asked and Cameron handed him a can and quickly left.

* * *

Later that day everyone was hanging out at the pool and having a cookout. Gwen and Cameron weren't very happy with how everything went. Gwen sighed and walked up to Courtney who was beating Harold up with a pitchfork. Gwen had a bunch of daisies that she pulled from the grass along with some weeds.

"Hey Courtney..." Gwen walked up to her and handed her the flowers. "I wanted to say that I'm sorry for stealing your boyfriend and I was a lousy friend, take these flowers and you and I can go out and get some food."

Courtney started laughing.

"That's pathetic." Courtney cracked up. "Are you flirting with me?"

"No, I just wan-" Gwen went to say but Courtney kept laughing.

"I'm really disturbed by this." Courtney snickered "I'm going to get a restraining order on you, you boyfriend stealing weirdo."

"Chef made me do this!" Gwen tried to tell her but Courtney was already walking away.

Gwen sighed and walked away. Courtney hated her even more now. Cameron could be seen getting thrown in the pool by Heather. Bridgette had to save him because he couldn't swim.

* * *

**No clue who's getting Therapy next but I'm open to suggestions. I'd like to keep it new/old but I know I'll change my mind by the 3rd of 4th chapter. Also, should I add some semi serious issues in here or keep it more on the funny side? Opinions? **


	3. Staci and Duncan

**Disclaimer: Nada.**

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The next morning everyone was quiet and starving, Chef didn't bother to make them breakfast, instead he threw bread on the table and gave them all a broken toaster. That was breakfast. When Chef and Chris finally walked into the dining area they provided, the contestants were angry and starving.

"Owen ate my pants!" Courtney glared at Chef. "Where is breakfast?! Owen at the bread and attempted to eat the toaster and then my pants!"

"My mirror." Justin held up the tiny shard of glass he had left from it, that Owen burped up.

"He ate my history book and my math book." Noah sighed. "I'm going to have to pay for those."

"Those sound like really good reasons to be angry!" Chris agreed. "You're all hungry and annoyed at Owen, you should really write something down and put it in the suggestion box."

"We have a suggestion box?" Zoey asked.

"No, but you can suggest that I get a suggestion box, in which I'll tell you all that I don't care." Chris smirked at them. "Anyway, it's time to talk to more people! I'm taking Staci. Chef, who do you want?"

"I'll take Duncan." Chef glared at him. "You and me, we have some things to discuss!"

"Great..." Duncan rolled his eyes. Staci was rambling on random facts. Chris and Chef took them and left the rest of the cast to beat up Owen.

* * *

Chris escorted Staci to his room and the girl looked around and touched everything she could get her hands on, that included Chris's shirts, his alarm clock and his bedroom slippers.

"Don't touch stuff." Chris sighed. "Where do you want to sit?"

"How about the bed? My great uncle Morris invented beds and before that everyone just slept on the floor like a turtle. How sad." Staci sighed and sat down on the bed.

"Okay then." Chris sat on his bed. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I have a fort in my room." Staci told him. "I like to sleep in it."

"You built a fort in your room?" Chris sighed. "I think you have bigger issues than that."

* * *

Chef had Duncan in the kitchen, in the same room that Gwen was sitting in yesterday. Duncan hated sitting in the kitchen with Chef.

"Can I have a beer?" Duncan asked him, Chef smirked.

"Chris has beer, not me." Chef informed him. "So, let's talk about the piercings, why do you insist on wearing them! They look stupid."

"My piercings aren't stupid." Duncan crossed his arms. "Gwen was right, you're judgmental."

"You aren't so tough! Those piercings aren't fooling anyone, Mister bed wetter." Chef laughed.

"I don't wet the bed." Duncan informed him. "That's Trent who does that."

"Nope." Chef laughed. "It's always you! I know whose bed sheets are whose, Duncan. You can lie to everyone on this show, but I'll know it's you and you'll know it's you."

"Ah, c'mon! I don't do it all the time, only when I watch scary movies!" Duncan tried to reason with him. "Do you know what it's like to live in the playa and sleep in a room all by yourself?"

"Yes, I'm aware of how to live by yourself." Chef rolled his eyes. "Why don't you sleep in Gwen's room?"

"No, because she goes to sleep at like 11:00pm." Duncan sighed. "Talk about a kill joy! at least Courtney stays up until around 2:00am!"

"See? you always mention her." Chef smirked. "I think you should just forget them both and date someone else."

"I don't wanna date anyone else." Duncan sighed. "Can I stop confessing stuff?"

* * *

Chris looked at his watch, Staci spent over an hour telling him about her fort and he didn't even get to say anything. Chris sighed and picked up his shirt from the floor and smelled it, he realized that it could really be washed. Yep, he was that bored.

"Hey Staci, do you want to have sex or something?" Chris asked her.

"My parents invented sex and had me." Staci told him. "Before that the human population was almost extinct."

"You are making my boner go down." Chris told her. "Get out."

"I thought we were having a therapy session." Staci asked him. "Did you know that my great uncle Phillip invented Therapy?"

"I don't care." Chris sighed and pushed Staci out of his room.

* * *

Chef was laughing his head off. He was telling Duncan about all the bad habits he thought that he should fix, finding out that Duncan wasn't nearly as tough as everyone thought, here was Duncan, crying his eyes out about the time his mother got rid of his teddy bear.

"That was the only real friend I had when I was growing up!" Duncan told Chef. "My mom gave him away! So, I threw her curling iron at a car window, I was 7 years old and that was when I first went to juvie!"

"Well we reached a breakthrough here, Duncan." Chef smirked. "Go back to your girlfriend and enjoy the rest of your day!"

* * *

Later that night, Chef announced to everyone that they would be watching a movie tonight, as an 'apology' for not giving them breakfast. Everyone applauded and gave mixed reactions. Chef put the DVD in and dimmed the lights.

"It's Steven King's: Kingdom Hospital. I hope you all enjoy." Chef smirked at Duncan and left the room. Staci started telling Alejandro about how her great uncle Steven made this movie. Alejandro, who never hits women, made an exception and pushed Staci onto the floor so he could watch the movie.

Gwen smiled at Duncan and held his hand for almost the whole movie, When he was sure she wasn't looking, he closed his eyes for the majority of the movie. He really hated Chef right now.

* * *

**This is fucking multi tasking, I'm on one couch, my mom is on the other. We're watching a movie while we're both on laptops, I started playing random music on my itunes and it's a weird shuffle mix LOL I just went from 'Belle' from Disney to "Better than revenge." by Taylor Swift and now I'm listening to 'Kill all your friends.' Talk about a weird selection. **


End file.
